[initially posted Wednesday May 2, 2007 - 09:35pm (EDT) on 360.yahoo.com]
This is a very long way to talk about a single word (respect), but the readers that press on will find it worthy of their time; in fact I believe those who do read this will be compelled to repeat it to others.
My father-in-law said to my wife when she was a young girl daring herself on out into the deep ocean waves, "you can have a lot of fun in the ocean, but you have to respect it." I personally never had the pleasure to meet him to ask more about it, so I was left to ponder the deeper meaning on my own.
If I was asked what respect was before this, I would have thought it was how I acted around "important" people, or at least the kind pretense that I gave them. Now I am sure it is not anything like that. Respect is the concept or realization that their are things outside ones own self that can effect significant changes in ones own life. All people should give proper respect to anything or person that has the power or authority to change their live for the better or for the worse. Respect the ocean; the water seems so playful and easy to navigate, yet rip tides cannot be fought, and waves move shores. Respect electricity; it can kill you bring you back to life, and keep you alive. Respect your boss, your kids, your neighbors, your civil service workers; all are likely to do you no harm, but truly giving them their due respect will bring you good fortune.
In mathematics we talk about the resulting "y" value with respect to the "x" variable. We do that because "x" is the thing we can control. Once on a high-school math quiz I asked, "given our conversation about respect & control, what is self-respect?" Most kids answered right, and I was testing their ability to apply ideas in new settings, though some protested it wasn't a math question. The intended answer is, the realization that I have power and control over the outcome of my own life. Too many times young children are convinced that they are powerless over life's annoyances or opportunities. It doesn't take much more than a few injustices to snuff the flame of hope from a teenager. It can be only one job rejection due to nepotism, or "good old boys" networking that crushes the passion out of a young adult o be quickly replaced by the weeds of cynicism. Building self-respect in young people requires vigilance in their parents, their teachers, and their other caregivers. Much of the children's programming I see my kids watch is devoted to lessons of self-respect in action; little kids standing up to the bully, etc.
In the recent decade past, I have lost nearly all hope and faith in politics, social/civil services, religious dogmas, & societal soap-box orators on radio and television. It was only recently that it occurred to me that this is the job that nobody did! I have lost my social-self-respect. I have enjoyed the many benefits of our society, and have complained often about politicians that were in the wrong. I only recently realized that I have been an accomplice in anything that has gone wrong by my total lack of activity. Not only did it seem like too much work to learn and think about issues that face us, it seemed like I shouldn't have to care about them because some politician would do it, just like the trash leaves my house once a week. The closest I came to doing anything toward sweeping social good was on a few occasions call in to a radio talk show and speak thoughtfully about the topic of the hour based on what I knew about it from the hosts opening paragraph.
Our society will not remain great if we allow social sloth to creep in. I urge you to, as I have recently, build up your own social-self-respect. Get involved in something that extends beyond your work life, your family life, and your religious life. Get dialed into groups of people that think your way as well as people that think against your way. Keep your mind open to their ideas. Find the good, find the bad, sort it out, and effect the changes that you know will make the world a better place.
Thanks for reading, thanks more for any comments, and thanks extremely if you pass this on to a friend.
